I went to a Buddhist temple this morning down in Eugene with a friend. We did the introduction to meditation and the lady that taught us was really nice. She had Rob's mom's vibes but a bit quirkier haha. Her interpretation of meditation and Buddhism is a lot like what I've learned. Things like it's okay that your mind wonders and to guide it back eventually. She said the mind is sneaky. We learned to focus on our mind, body, and soul. Our teacher said the body was the most important because we don't focus on our body as much as our mind. Really checking in on how our body is doing is important.
Another lady (I think the highest priest lady) spent the last half of the service telling a story, sharing poetry, answering questions, and just talking about life. Buddhism to her seems to be about awareness. Awareness of attachment and not demonizing attachment. Her definition of attachment is also a lot different than normal. She talked a lot about how if she is in a bad place that focusing on it and trying to fix it spirals and makes it worse/bigger. It'll resolve on it's own, but being aware of it allows you to understand it and be able to manage it better in the future. It was extremely similar to how I've grown in the past
The main priest that talked also talked about the landscape of your inner self in her story which really spoke to me. I thought it was a really cool way to materialize how you're doing. I immediately thought of a dark storm. Really dark storm clouds with wind and rain at a 45 degree slant. I wonder why that is. Maybe I'm feeling unstable or uncertain in myself. I'm not who I want to be right now. I know I'm not. I want to be who I was 3 years ago. I want to be that selfless, kind, considerate human that looked at others not in a negative way, but loving way. In a loving of humanity way. I miss university a lot. I miss going to bars with friends, drinking, and working on things together. Maybe I just miss friends or the comradery. Maybe it's like trauma bonding over tough times, haha. I'm not entirely sure. The idea of a landscape of your inner self was really eye opening to me. It's pretty incredible how symbolic images are. I think I often times forget that.
